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| Kawkawlin Country House: almost perfect |
A country house sounds like the sort of place where Martha Stewart might spend a happy afternoon gathering eggs from contented free-range chickens.
The Kawkawlin Country House, for instance, sits across from an old feed store that might be described as shabby chic and next to railroad tracks that curve off longingly into woods.
But inside one afternoon, instead of Martha crafting dainty tarts, we found Jamie from Crump ("I'll kick your ass from stump to stump," she joked) behind the bar, popping tabs off beer cans.
And if you're looking for a country house, you might drive right past this low-slung concrete block building. If you do, though, you'll miss a friendly bar with cheap beers that's a great spot to shoot pool -- a more traditional bar than some of the snazzier and noisier places in Bay City.
Kawkawlin is indeed a quiet place, and Jamie says she doesn't go into Bay City if she can help it. "I don't like hustle-bustle," she says. We don't consider Bay City terribly bustling, but we're not
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| Jamie at the Country House |
We showed up on a Monday, which turns out to have pros and cons in Kawkawlin. On one hand, cans of beer at the Country House are $1 till 6 p.m. Mondays. On the other hand, the feed store is closed Mondays, so we couldn't stock up on oats or who knows what else. (The store's website says a ton -- a ton! -- of the regular blend of horse feed is $800. That's 800 cans of Bud Light on Mondays across the street, though your horse may not like Bud Light.)
The rest of the week at the Country House, the canned beers are $1.50, which won't buy nearly as much horse feed. If you want something in a bottle, prices vary.
Three taps hold a troika of lights -- Busch Light ($1.25 for a 16-ouncer), Miller Lite and Bud Light ($1.50). But with the deal on cans, the taps were ignored when we stopped in. (We did the
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| Inside the spacious bar |
After some beer, it was time for our routine of asking for a Manhattan. You never know what will happen.
Jamie was shocked: "You're asking the girl from Crump for a Manhattan?" She checked but found no vermouth, so that was out. She proposed instead an Alabama Slammer, but we passed.
Jamie says they sell a lot of picklebacks with tequila. But eyeing the bottles prominently displayed behind the bar -- including Dr. McGillicuddy's Mentholmint (the champagne of mint schnapps), Midori and Arrow sloe gin -- we opted to try a shot of DeKuyper Cactus Juice, which turns out to taste just like a margarita.
Food? The complete (but basic) menu is on the wall. A large hamburger is $4.50, fries $2.25.
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| Country House menu |
Also, a rack at the end of the bar has an impressive collection of bagged snacks -- popcorn, pork rings, varied potato chips and the like (in large bags at $1.75). We got some Better Made puffy corn-based things called Onion Rings, only because we were intrigued that the label prominently adds the phrase "onion flavored" just to be clear. If that's not enough, there are -- and we think this is a first for local bars -- packages of red licorice sticks.
A sign advertises infused cherries at four for $1. Jamie didn't know what they were infused with, but we didn't taste anything obvious so vodka is the best guess.
About the pool tables: There are two good ones and games are only 50 cents. Many bars have warped cues, maybe not enough room to make some shots and leave you hunting for chalk. Not here.
Each of the Nick Varner cues is stamped with its weight. They're straight. There's lots of chalk. The walls aren't in the way. And there are two of the fanciest spectator chairs we've ever seen,
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| Pool cues |
The bar also has three Nudgemaster video consoles and a lottery machine. If the Country House only had a shuffleboard table, we'd be inclined to declare this the perfect bar. But even without that, it's close.
TVs have game shows during the day, sports when available. ("We try not to put anything on with politics," says Jamie, wisely.)
Little things on the bar look like feet that fell off of bar stools but turn out to be for holding the tabs from beer cans. Jamie says the metal is saved up and sold for scrap, with the money used for dialysis patients.
And for a great bar hack, each bottle behind the bar has a sawed-off golf tee stuck in the pour spout to keep out bugs. We didn't see any bugs, but it doesn't hurt to be careful.
Two warnings: The bar doesn't take credit cards, though you'd have to work at it to run up a big bill here. There is an ATM.
Second, Jamie says someone once walked in with a monkey, and that didn't go over well. So
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| Feed store across the street |
Heading up M-13, the Country House is right behind the Kawkawlin Restaurant (which seems to be closed almost as much as it's open). Across the street behind the feed store (and on the other side of the tracks) is a company that does hood cleaning, of all things. Is this where hoodlums go to get cleaned up for court? No. Turns out they clean cooking grease from commercial kitchens.
Inside the bar, everything looked clean to us. The Formica bar isn't even chipped. The men's room is clean. And a life-size cardboard cutout of NASCAR driver Kevin Harvick in a clean Busch beer suit stands near a corner. But no Martha Stewart.
The Country House is open 10 a.m. to 11 p.m. (or maybe a bit earlier if nobody is around).
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See Doc's report: At the Country House, you can save the tab you left
Country House
106 W. Grove
Kawkawlin
989-671-2880
1 comment:
It is a fun bar. They also host a weekly trivia night called Twisted Trivia. And they also do other activities like Euchre games on Sundays and even Sing-a-long nights (karaoke from your seat)
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